I m meera, single , 30+, i couldnt get marry at the right time because of some family constraints?

i working in pvt office, i m not depending upon anybody, taking care of my family also, as my father is not responsible person, i m also human being right, i too had many dreams about my family life. i didnt get that. i got engaged 5 years back but it is cancelled because of family reasons. meanwhile i got friendship with married man. he is very gudperson, but very casual, he says he loves me, but i nevr flt like tht, he wil be with me for present moments only, if we go to hotel then also he wil be busy with his mobile , talking with friends, wife, enquiring about his kids through phone, which irritates me much, very casual person, i m not telling that he misbehaves with me, it is my fault tht i got emotionally attached to him. and suffered a lot with his casualness, many time i hav tried to come out of this. i know he wil talk with many girls in casual way , in the same way he talks with me also, but i m one fool, who cant come out his hangover. many times i hav quaralled, changed the number, but still he is cool, my absence never makes any diffrnc to him. now i got one offer from his side that i can work parttime with him. those who are reading this words kindly suggest me what i hav to do now? i feel very jeolosy about his love towards his wife and kids. because he loves them very much, i cant tolerate that, i m not bad girl. i m not wishing any bad for him. let him be happy, let god give all the happiness to him, but inner somewhr i cant tolerate all this, in this situation if i work with him, everyday i hav to see that he is playing with his kid , or family, tht time how can digest al this and how can i be happy? money is not only the matter but my mental status is also very imp na. do you want me to be with him? or you dont want me to work with him but be in touch wth him? you dont want me to cut off contact with him. or you want to, i m in confusion , very emotional and sensitive girl, and very week minded in this issue. i dont hav any option always i wil be crying. kindly suggest me what i hav to do?